Whats happened to me?

When I came back to Michigan I fought for God in my own way. I wanted to work for the Lord so he showed me a path that wasnt easy. To tell the truth it seemed to me that no one believed in me. I praise God that he always has faith in us that he died for us and is ministering for us. I realized today how little faith people had in me and how much I proved them wrong. I did not feel satisfied to hear that I defied their expectaions of me. I cried harder than I have in a long time. At that time it was God and I. It was us against the world. It was my goal to be where I am at now but what happened to that? Now that people believe in me I lose my fire? Lord have mercy on my soul. Please dont let me feel comfortable just being where Im at. Help me to once again defy the sceptics even the sceptic within. Thank you Lord for waking me up...